Happy Monday. The 17th hole at TPC Sawgrass has seen it all, but nothing compares to the Florida State student who dove in during a playoff to decide the 1987 Players Championship. Hal Valdes, fueled by a day of "screwdrivers" after being "out all night," jumped into the water for a $500 bet just as Jeff Sluman was addressing a potential tournament-winning putt. The disruption caused Sluman to back off and miss his 5-footer, costing him his first PGA Tour victory as CBS announcer Ben Wright suggested they "might feed him to the alligator" in outrage. ⬇️

If you’re new here, welcome to Bogey Bois Golf. 5 minutes of golf news that won’t put you to sleep every Monday, Wednesday, & Friday.

🔍 Today’s highlights:

• ⛳️ Adam Hadwin’s wife just learned there's a time and place for dark humor - and it's not while driving past the first tee after your husband missed the cut (awkward)

• 🤬 Augusta National's infamous "penalty box" has claimed victims ranging from Tiger Woods to CBS broadcasters (broadcasting legend Jack Whitaker was banned for life because he referred to the crowd as a ‘mob’)

• 🏆 78-year-old Donald Trump won the club championship at the golf course he owns for the third straight year (nothing fishy about that…)

🐝 Stinger of the Day

@mollielouisw

🎙️ The Starter

Last Starter: 73% of readers knew that Tiger’s nickname comes from his father’s military friend. Unfortunately, it seems like Tiger’s career may be over (or at least very close to over). That being said, let’s watch his most iconic shot ever (is there even a debate?) ⬇️

📰 GOLF STORIES

⛳️ How NOT to cheer up your PGA Tour husband

The "Max Homa of PGA Tour WAGs" just learned there's a time and place for dark humor - and it's not while driving past the first tee after your husband missed the cut. Jessica Hadwin's attempt to lighten Adam's mood following his Players Championship exit backfired so catastrophically that she "wanted to jump from the moving vehicle." The ill-timed joke landed particularly hard considering Adam had just shot an impressive three-under 69 but still missed the weekend. ⬇️

🤬 Augusta National does NOT mess around

Augusta National's infamous "penalty box" has claimed victims ranging from Tiger Woods to CBS broadcasters. Golf's most exclusive club has banned members for having affairs with the chairman's secretary, ejected a past champion for playing "too old," and permanently exiled Gary Player's son for tacky product placement during Lee Elder's historic ceremony. The pettiest punishment? Broadcasting legend Jack Whitaker was permanently removed from CBS coverage for calling the gallery a "mob" instead of "patrons" - proving you don't mess with Augusta's vocabulary rules. ⬇️

🏆 Donald Trump wins championship (again)

Donald Trump just achieved the shocking feat of winning the club championship at the golf course he personally owns and controls. The 78-year-old president defeated the paying members who fund his club's operations for the third straight year, calling it "such a great honor" on Truth Social. In his 2023 victory announcement, Trump explained why these wins matter: they prove he has the "strength & stamina to WIN" and "GOVERN" - unlike most others. ⬇️

🍻 THE PARKING LOT

Inside Greg Norman’s Florida Mansion & Insane Yacht ⬇️

Read:

• Justin Thomas would do “really weird things” for a Bud Cawley win at Sawgrass

• LPGA pro got married at Mar-a-Lago and Trump crashed the wedding

• Michael Kim has a funny (but kind of evil) wish for the rest of the field after missing the cut

• J.J. Watt is facing a tough dilemma ahead of his first ever round at Augusta National

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